Words hurt
by ssl71
Summary: Callen is injured during a takedown and the team (including the Wonder Twins) squarely lays the blame on Kensi.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Callensi fic, slightly OC. Characters and series credit to Shane Brennan, JP Kousakis and R. Scott Gemmill. Callen and Kensi (Callensi) Angst/Hurt

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Chapter 1: The takedown

"Go Away Kensi" yelled Callen as she tried to help him get up after taking a bullet in his vest during a takedown.

The takedown was typical. Team splits to surround the suspect, gunfire is exchanged, and the team gets the bad guy - sometimes alive sometimes dead.

Everyone yelled "clear" but Callen had an uneasy feeling something was off. As he surveyed the scene, he saw a flash and realized there was another gunman who was aiming at Sam. He pushed Sam out of the way and got shot in the process. Sam immediately ran over to assist in addition to Kensi and Deeks.

Callen looked over at Kensi and asked _"I thought you said it was clear."_

Kensi, taken aback by his tone, responded _"It was, Callen, even Deeks checked as well, right Deeks?"._

Deeks replied _"Well, I assumed you got it so I didn't check behind you."_

Sam angrily confronted Kensi _"What the hell Kensi, you know better."_

Eric then chose that moment to pipe up from OPS _"I looked at the footage and Kensi, you didn't check every spot."_

Nell, being the most direct one of the duo, blurted out _"Kensi, Callen was shot because of you. I can't believe you were so careless."_

After receiving angry glares from the guys, and with Callen yelling at her to go away, Kensi left the scene and returned to the hacienda. Mosely met up with her in the bullpen as she was packing her bag. _"Agent Blye, please come to my office so we can discuss what happened."_ After reciting everything that happened, Kensi then braced herself for whatever reprimand Mosely was about to hand down.

Mosely, for her part, remained stoic during Kensi's recitation. _"Agent Blye, may I call you Kensi?"_ Kensi nodded. _"Kensi, we are not robots, we are human. And because we are human, we make mistakes."_ Kensi started to speak but Mosely help up a hand before she could. _"Though you may have missed a spot when checking according to Eric, who is to say the gunman was hiding elsewhere and returned after you passed the area. Kensi, you've always had your teams' back, so it surprised me how quickly they all turned on you._ " 

Kensi sighed " _I know things were rough with the mole and when I was injured. I just don't know what to do. I'd like to think I had proven myself enough times that I can be back with them and working cases. I love all of them, but seeing the anger in their eyes and hearing it in their voices, makes me... makes me think they should've left me to die in Syria._ "

Mosely _"Kensi you can't think like that! Besides that's water under the bridge. Here's what I think you should do. You've got more than enough leave racked up. Take a couple of weeks and go find a weekly beach rental outside of LA. Don't tell anyone you're leaving; not even your mother. Leave your phone here and I'll give you a burner to use. Oh and you can call me Shay."_

Kensi _"Okay... why are you doing this, Shay?"_

Mosely _"Because us women need to take care of each other. Now, go down and clean your desk a bit. Then go home and pack and I'll see you in three weeks."_

Kensi _"Yes ma'am._ "

Kensi finished cleaning her desk of the files, etc. She grabbed her bag, briefly looked at the other desks in the bullpen and then headed out the door, unbeknownst to her teammates.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: The truth

The next morning the guys entered the bullpen, expecting Kensi to be there. Deciding she was likely avoiding them, they went about their day working on cases and filing reports.

Deeks said they were over. When he got home, Kensi had moved her things out of the house and left the engagement ring on the dining table with a note. He then received a text message from Julia stating Kensi was at her house. He assumed Kensi stayed there for the night, so gave her space to calm down.

Around lunchtime, Callen's patience had worn thin as he dialed Kensi's phone for about the 10th time to no avail. He was now concerned Kensi had not showed up and was not responding to texts. Callen was about to call Eric when Mosely showed up in the bullpen with Harley, Nell and Eric.

Mosely _"If you're looking for Kensi, don't bother. She's on leave and has been instructed by myself not to converse with any of you."_

Callen _"Where is she?"_

Mosely _"That's none of your concern, Agent Callen. All you need to know is Hidoko will be partnering up with either yourself, Agent Hanna or Detective Deeks until Kensi returns._

Callen " _The hell it isn't. She's part of the team and I have a right to know where she is."_

Mosely _"Well, for someone who feels that strongly, you have a funny way of showing it. Simply put: when you and your buddies here told her to go away, she did exactly that. Did you know she wished you three should've left her in Syria to die? What's more to say?"_

Mosely walks away, leaving a stunned team to figure out how to reach Kensi and convince her to come back where she belongs.

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Meanwhile, Kensi had returned from a long walk on the beach. While driving the day before, she had stopped for dinner. When chatting with the server, Kensi learned of a couple of nearby beach rentals. Thankfully one of the landlords was also having dinner at the restaurant, so she insisted Kensi follow her to the rental. Kensi loved it at first sight, and immediately gave the deposit. She texted Mosley the address after purchasing some groceries and fell into a restless asleep soon afterwards.

The next morning, Kensi had gone exploring around the area. A majority of the shops were within walking distance of the rental, so she left her Audi in the rental's garage. She discovered a library and checked-out a few books to occupy her time. Once Kensi was back at the rental, she went out to the deck overlooking the beach and relaxed in the chair with one of the books.

Kensi's mind kept going back to the events of the day before and couldn't understand how things went south so fast. She felt sad and betrayed; the trust she had built up over the years was fading fast. She wanted to make things right with everyone but was not ready to face them just yet.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: The case

Two weeks later found three very grumpy guys in the bullpen. They had tried every means possible to locate Kensi, despite Mosely's warnings, but it was like she had vanished. Callen quietly chuckled to himself as disappearing was more his style.

Callen was looking at pictures on his phone. He came across a few of himself and Kensi laughing and hugging, and couldn't help the stray tear that fell from his eye. Callen knew he was upset with her that day but didn't realize how much his words (and everyone else's) affected her. " _Where are you, Kens?_ " he thought.

Eric called everyone up to OPS for the latest case - a high priority one which made Mosely nervous. One part of the mission required attendance at a banquet. A deal was scheduled to go down and Callen was going undercover as the arms dealer who was invited to the banquet with his "wife". Callen wondered if Kensi could be convinced to come back and work the case. Mosely agreed Kensi would be perfect and said she would contact her but there were no guarantees.

Later that evening, the team prepared for the op while dressed in formal wear. Since no one knew if Kensi would appear, Sam and Hidoko were ready to step in as the couple. Kensi suddenly strolled in looking elegant and deadly in a floor length red dress. Callen had to take a couple of seconds to get his voice back.

Callen " _Kens, you look beautiful! Can I talk to you quickly before we head out?"_

Kensi " _Thank you. Can we talk later? I'd rather get this op over with so I can go back to being on leave. Besides, Mosely already briefed me on the case."_

Callen _"Fine but we are going to talk."_

Kensi shook her head _"Whatever."_

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As the banquet was underway, Callen had a bad feeling.

Callen _"Sam, does something feel off to you?"_

Sam _"Besides the attitude Kensi is throwing our way, no. Why do you ask?"_

Callen _"As long as she does her part, I'm not worried about her attitude."_

Soon enough gunfire erupted in the hall.

Callen looked for Kensi but couldn't find her. _"Kensi, where are you?"_

Kensi _"Callen, remember I said I was powdering my nose and I'll be right back. I can see the gunman from my location. He's heading towards the back door."_

Callen _"That's right, I'm sorry. Sam, do you see him? Kensi, cover Sam while he's tracking the gunman. Then meet up with me as soon as possible."_

Kensi, went after the gunman whom she recognized as the one who was aiming at Sam and shot Callen. _"Callen, that's the same one who shot you. I'm not making the same mistake twice. I'm going after him."_

Callen _"Kensi, no!"_

By the time he reached her, he was stunned at the sight in front of him. The gunman was dead. But Kensi, she was on the ground and bleeding profusely from the multiple bullets that hit her.

Callen yelled _"Kensi! Kens, hang on. I've got you. Eric, send the ambulance now! Kensi's been shot and is bleeding out."_

Sam and Deeks quickly made their way over to help stop the bleeding. Callen cradled Kensi in his lap and kept encouraging her to breathe and keep her eyes open. As time went on, her breathing became more shallow and she grew more pale by the minute.

Kensi _"I... I'm sorry Callen. Forgive me."_ Those were the last word Kensi spoke before she passed out.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Kensi's recovery

Callen was sitting by Kensi's bedside, holding her hand and wishing for her to open her beautiful eyes. After surgery, the doctors had put her in a medically-induced coma to help with the healing. They had stopped the medication and now it was a matter of time before she woke up.

In the meantime, Mosely had driven to the beach rental and put down an additional deposit for two more months. She figured once Kensi is released from the hospital, she can go back there and recuperate. Mosely also arranged for groceries, housekeeping and Eric to set up some video games, etc. so Kensi wouldn't strain herself or get bored.

Callen, Sam and Deeks had stayed with Kensi at the hospital, taking turns so she was protected 24/7. They had no idea if the gunman had any "friends" who would potentially come after Kensi, so they weren't taking any chances. Mosely and Harley even stayed for a bit, bringing Callen a change of clothes so he could freshen up.

But Callen insisted on staying the longest. He was ultimately responsible for her. Callen knew it was unhealthy to keep replaying the image of her bleeding out in his head. He just couldn't believe how far Kensi was willing to go for him.

A small moan grabbed his attention and he was rewarded with a pair of mismatched eyes staring back at him accompanied by a small sleepy smile. Callen did the only thing that felt right at the moment - he got up and kissed her.

Callen _"Hey beautiful! How are you?"_

Kensi croaked _"Hey handsome. I'll feel a little better if you can kiss me again."_

Callen smirked _"Well if that is what it takes, who am I to argue."_

They were quietly interrupted by the treating doctor, who had come in to check on Kensi. When he asked Callen to leave, Kensi tightly squeezed Callen's hand and asked the doctor if Callen could stay. The doctor relented, as long as Callen stayed out of the way during the examination.

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When Kensi was discharged from the hospital two weeks later, Callen picked her up and took her to the beach rental. Mosely insisted he stay with Kensi, as it would be good for both of them. Sam and Deeks made Callen promise to convince Kensi to come back. He wouldn't guarantee it but said he's willing to try just about everything.

Kensi's recovery was going very well, even after a month. Though Callen insisted on sleeping on the very comfortable sofa, Kensi wanted him to sleep with her in her bed. She had nightmares from when she (and Callen) were shot and felt better when he was next to her. Callen happily obliged, and though it wasn't romantic in nature, he loved that she felt safe when he was with her in bed.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Kensi's decision and the beginning of Callensi

One afternoon, Kensi and Callen were relaxing in the deck chairs after a walk on the beach. She was gaining more strength every day, but wasn't cleared to work for another month. Kensi turned to Callen and asked _"Can we talk about what happened when you were shot?"_

Callen _"What's there to talk about? I was shot and, like a total moron, blamed you. Furthermore, everyone else acted like morons and blamed you as well."_

Kensi " _But Callen, I..."_

Callen _"No Kensi, you have nothing to be ashamed of in regards to my shooting. We all acted like idiots and blamed you. Now please, can we drop it?"_

Kensi sighed " _Callen, I just wanted to say how much your words (and everyone else's) got to me. It hurt so much, I was ready to quit OSP and possibly NCIS! My trust in all of you was shattered and I wasn't sure if I'd get it back. Mosely was the one to talk me down and insist I take leave for a few weeks."_

Callen gasped at this revelation. _"And now, what do you think? Do you still want to work with us?"_

Kensi _"I admit, I wasn't sure about returning for the case. But once I was back, I knew my place was with all of you. If you all didn't feel the same, I was going to ask for a transfer to the DC office."_ Callen started to speak but Kensi pressed on. _"Just before I left the hospital, Mosely was visiting and she said_ _you were the one to request I come back and work on the case. She also said h_ _ow you insisted on staying with me every night at the hospital, despite Sam and Deeks wanting to take turns."_

Callen grabbed her hand " _Kens, we were in the wrong. Please stay with us... with me. I need you, as a team member and ... "_

Kensi " _Callen, I had already decided I'm staying... wait, what do you mean by 'and'... and what?"_

Callen _"And as my girlfriend/significant other, whatever you want to call it, if you're interested."_

Kensi's response was to jump out of her chair, onto his lap and kiss him. _"If you haven't figured it out, that's a yes from me."_

Callen smirked _"Good!"_ She adjusted herself on his lap so they could snuggle. After a few minutes, Kensi pulled away " _Callen, what about Sam and Deeks? Won't they, especially Deeks, be upset about us being together? And, Shay, I mean Mosely?!_ "

Callen " _Yeah, about that. When you were in the coma, I had a talk with all of them. They knew I felt something for you, but it took you getting shot and bleeding out in my arms for me to realize how strong those feelings were. The big guy said 'it's about damn time!' Deeks didn't seem surprised at all, but did warn me not to hurt you. Mosely suspected it, which is why she suggested I stay here with you while you recover._ "

Kensi _"So that leaves the Wonder Twins and Hidoko. Oh and Gibbs."_

Callen " _Mosely handled all except Gibbs. Nell and Hidoko, are literally putting the cart before the horse and are ready to plan your bridal shower. Eric is as clueless as ever but has Nell to clarify everything."_

Kensi _"And Gibbs?"_

Callen " _Gibbs chastised me for breaking one of his rules and for taking so long to come to my senses after all these years. He also jumped on the marriage bandwagon and insisted our future kids call him grandpa."_

Kensi giggled " _In that case, can we call Sam and Deeks and see if they can come over so we can tell them_? _Then let's call Gibbs, afterwards._ "

Callen " _Sure, if that's what you want._ "

Kensi kissing Callen _"Y_ _eah, I'm sure."_

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Callen and Kensi FaceTimed with Gibbs, who extended his well wishes and planned to fly out to LA soon.

Once Sam and Deeks arrived (with Monty in tow), they had a long chat, notifying them of Kensi's decision and their relationship. Since the drive back to LA was over 2 hours, Callen and Kensi insisted the guys stay for dinner and overnight.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: The mission before returning to OSP

Two weeks later, Kensi was itching to do something work related. Mosely dropped in for a visit, and gave her (and Callen) a task they never saw coming.

Mosely _"Kensi, I have an assignment for you that is very close to me. I, technically, can't do any research but realized you are far enough from OSP to conduct your own investigation. Are you interested?"_

Before Kensi could speak, Callen spoke up _"Exactly what or who are we looking for?"_ Mosely responded _"That's easy Agent Callen... my son Derek."_ Callen and Kensi were stunned.

Callen _"How come we're just now hearing about this?"_ Kensi piped up _"You have a son?"_

Mosely " _Director Vance insisted I not bring it up to all of you initially. Before you ask, Derek was taken by his father back in July for what was supposed to be a month long, father-son bonding trip. They never returned home and then a month later, I was assigned to OSP."_

Kensi _"Wait, that boy Enrique, when we brought him to the boatshed, you immediately knew what to do to get him to talk."_

Mosely nodded _"Enrique and Derek_ _are the same age. I took a chance with the video game and it worked."_

Callen _"Are they in DC? I'm sure Vance put them on the watchlist._ "

Mosely sighed _"Honestly, I don't know. They could be out of the country for all I know. I had filed the missing persons report but nothing came up. My mother's instinct, or gut instinct if you call it that, tells me Derek is still alive. Look, I just want my son home with me, so will you help me?"_

Callen and Kensi, both having experienced searching for family and the truth, looked at each other before Kensi responded _"Of course, we'll help you."_

In a surprise move, Mosely hugged both of them, thanking them for any assistance, before leaving the cottage.

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Before Callen and Kensi knew it, two weeks had flown by and it was time to pack up and head back to LA.

There were no new developments in finding Derek, but they weren't giving up.

As Kensi entered the hacienda holding Callen's hand, she smiled at the sight in the bullpen. In addition to Sam, Deeks, Nell, Harley and Mosely, she found Nate, Hetty and Gibbs waiting for them.

Hugs were exchanged and after Kensi said she was staying, Callen announced they were in a relationship. Hetty stated "I called this relationship years ago... glad you two finally got there." She then walked up to Callen and hugged him in front of the group before doing the same with Kensi. Hetty turned to the others and said _"Enough with standing around... back to work people."_

Later in the day, Callen and Sam were catching up while getting coffee in the kitchenette next to the bullpen. Kensi sat down at her desk - loving that she shared it with Callen - and smiled. Deeks caught the smile and made an inappropriate comment, which led to a perfectly aimed pencil thrown at him. As Callen set down both his and Kensi's coffee cups on their desk, Deeks turned to him to complain about partner abuse. Callen merely smirked at Deeks, then leaned over and kissed Kensi, saying _"good aim"_ in front of everyone.

As Eric was about to announce there was a case, Hetty requested everyone go to OPS, stealing his thunder. Callen led the team upstairs with Kensi by his side, ready to handle whatever is sent their way.

The End.


End file.
